Organising A Munch
Organising a munch is generally a lot more hassle than it should be. In theory you have a group of people who all want to get together in a relaxed environment and talk about the scene. The reality is that you have to deal with: far less people turning up than promised; general apathy from people who claim excitement; finding a good venue; finding a good time; publicising it; security and safety; general policies; and processions of Hare Krishnas (long story, but it has happened to us). When it works, it is very rewarding, but it is a lot of work.
Who To Invite
You'll probably already have an idea of who you want to invite.If it is a group who meet up on the net or via some other forum, the unfortunate reality is most of those who are telling you what a wonderful idea it is won't be able to afford the train fare, are busy that day, can't get a baby sitter, or, for any one of a hundred other reasons, can't make it.
If you're an established group of friends, it makes life a lot easier. Friends can generally be relied upon to turn up, though make sure you give them plenty of warning. You also know what your friends are like. If you are trying to get a munch off the ground, make sure you consider who you invite - more on that later.
Getting back to the forum group, rather than trying to organise munches for everyone from the start, get to know a few of the regulars, face to face, on a casual basis. Once they are friends, you can usually rely on them turning up. By using a core of friends, you can guarantee that there's always the basis of a successful munch - a reasonable number of people who can talk about the scene without causing too much trouble. Then you can open it up to others. Whether others turn up or not, you've got a successful munch going and any absences matter a lot less.
While building up a regular core, you do not want to get to the point where a clique forms. Unless it is very specifically for one group of friends, you will want to keep it approachable and cliques are a very good way of ensuring that does not happen.
It is important to consider the make up of the munch. You don't want to be too demanding - a load of rules just leave people uncomfortable and if people are not comfortable, you have already killed the munch off yourself. While you do not want to be too demanding, you need to ensure everyone enjoys themselves. Some things to consider are: If you're just starting, is there anyone who is too aggressive, too depressing, etc. for the group to want to keep meeting up in their presence? (Unfortunate but important to consider); How are you going to deal with there generally being more males interested than females? (Accept it? Don't allow single males? Only allow people who are invited by an existing member? Some other way?); Is it for just subs, just Doms, just D/s, just S/M or pan-sexual (open to everyone of all sexualities)?
Finding A Good Venue
If you are planning on holding it in a home: Does the person whose home it is want people knowing where they live? Are they prepared for whatever your security and safety arrangements haven't taken in to account? What will the neighbours say? Does the person whose home it is care? Do they have children? Will the kids be safely out of the way? What happens if a neighbour reports those kids as being in danger?If you are planning in holding your munch in a public place: Can you get a private area or do you have to accept anyone walking in off the street? If it is private, will you have to pay for it or can you bring in enough extra, well behaved business for them to let you have it for free? If it is public, what will you do about the person you banned last month wandering in, or hassle from other patrons? Is it a good place to chat? Is there music and is it too loud to talk over? (A lot of bars play loud, fast, music to encourage people to drink quickly and buy more. They may not be prepared to turn it off/down) What's the place like at the time you are all meeting? (We've learned the hard way that a quiet bar mid-week can be both loud and busy on a Saturday night). Is there enough seating/space? (A regular venue we use is a great place but never has enough seats).
Finding A Good Time
Think about who you are aiming to have come. We first assumed that Saturday night would be a good time. After all, people are busy midweek, right? In reality, a lot of people have plans at weekends. Divorced parents are seeing children, couples are going away, etc. Moving to a week-night clashes with other things but may actually turn out easier for people to make. In the same way, afternoon munches are a great time for people to leave their children with friends for the afternoon or for teenagers to be trusted at home alone, they allow people time to travel there and back home afterwards. It is worth asking people when suits them best, you might be surprised by their answers.
You may want to consider trying different times/days of the week. While everyone may tell you a given time is difficult for them, they may actually still be able to make it along with a lot of others who could not make it before. Just because everyone told you that a given time was bad for them, does not always ensure it actually is. Be careful with changing dates and times around. If you are planning on organising a regular munch, keeping a regular time people can plan for makes life a lot easier.
Whenever you arrange, some people are not going to be able to make it. Unfortunately, with any sized group, you can't please everyone. Find a time that the organisers can make and then as many as possible of the others.
SoulThief
Back To The TopConclusion
I know, there are a lot of questions there and not too many answers. How you organise your munch is entirely up to you. These are just some of the topics that ought to be addressed first, along with what advice we can give. How you answer the questions will define the style of your group and that is entirely up to you.
This page was last updated on Sunday 10th 2000f September 2000