That said, here's a bit of good advice that does apply quite aptly to the scene. As a slave, it is very important that you contribute to the relationship that exists between you and your Master/Mistress. It's a bit akin to the typical younger teenage First-Relationship Trap: you give up all of your pursuits so that you can watch your Adored practice football after school. Whether he notices you or not, you dog his heels faithfully. When he does fall for someone, he falls for the girl who never knew he existed. You are dismayed, and can't understand why he didn't notice your devotion.

The harsh truth is that he did notice your devotion, but in the absence of anything else to offer, he found it frankly boring. What the other girl had was a life of her own, and interests and pursuits that she could offer as other facets of herself. She had other dimensions besides blind adoration, and thus she sparkled. She was interesting, and instead of expecting him to be her entire existence, she could sustain her own happy world--occasionally even inviting him in.

So, why this foray into 50's angst? It is important that you do not lose yourself in the process of being your Master's slave. A relationship, no matter the nature, will wither and die if it is not constantly fed. It is fed through the interests, passions, and energies of the people involved. On a personal note, my passion is fitness. I talk about fitness to anyone I can, and read everything I can on the subject. I read all the magazines, can chat about the merits of fad diets ans new sports crazes, and am always ready to explore a new part of it. I have convinced SoulThief to buy new rollerblades, and to go to the park with me on weekends to 'play'. We've also gone biking in part of Kent, and I've taught him bits of weightlifting. This is something that I bring to the relationship. It's not a submissive thing, it is not based in the concept of our negotiated power exchange. It is, however, something that is interesting about me, that I know about and he does not, that excites and gratifies me. My passion for that, and for other things, It is a way in which I can contribute energy and excitement to our relationship.

If you are pursuing a relationship with a new Dom/me, remember that everything about you makes you who you are. It sounds simplistic, but it's very true. If you read voraciously, continue to read voraciously. If you play videogames like a giddy schoolchild, continue to play. If you are in school, finish your studies. Find a way to incorporate these parts of yourself into the relationship: talk about books you've read, or exchange good books; invite your prospective partner to play a game with you; talk about your studies and parts of them that are especially interesting. Make sure you are not just feeding off the energy that your Dom/me is bringing to the relationship. Try to contribute your own energy as well. Make every effort to avoid being a 'relationship vampire', sucking all the energy and effort out of the relationship and not contributing any back.

*k